Wanna Be a Baller

Shot Caller, 20-inch blades on the Impala

I've used that before, haven't I? Indulge me, it is what's spinning, and the right tempo for what I intend to write. 

Since I began my journey as a professional Domme, a hundred million years ago, in the spring of 1999, it has been a near daily occurrence, sometimes multi times a day, for men to ask how they might arrange to spend time with me and then complain when I answer their question. My ads state that my tribute is outrageous. Literally, in my most playful, is she serious tone, I state, do not contact me unless outrageous sounds reasonable to you. I appreciate we haven't yet met, but you know who you're contacting. 

If a sub maintains a respectful tone while they process their sticker shock, I actually will entertain a counteroffer, at times I even indulge in a little barter. That is almost unheard of among professional Dommes. I am an anarchist at heart; the idea of a gift economy gets me wet even while I recognize the impossibility of it. Well, the impossibility of it for you anyway, for me it's working out quite well. Don't interrupt me with the nonsense of your reality. 

It is highly unlikely I will accept your counteroffer, but it amuses me to watch you shoot your shot. As for offers of service, I live a charmed life, most of my needs are already met. There are only a handful of specific wishes left that I would indulge another a quid pro quo arrangement. Of course, it should go without saying, only with select individuals who are qualified. I have no need of a sub to make my dinner, but I'd make an exception for a Michelin-starred chef or Alton Brown. 

This applies to the men who offer themselves as content collaborators. I am open to collaborations, with professionals. If I need to define what makes one a professional content creator; quite simply that proves that you are not. For the curious though, if you wished to collaborate with me you must be a certified creator on the platforms I use. You must have the costumes, tools, and equipment associated with your niche. Ideally your social follows are comparable to mine. I will make an exception to that requirement for new creators if they have an obvious pattern of growth that reflects how long they have been in the industry.  In any case simply being a body that is willing to have pictures taken while you experience your fantasy is not hardly unique. It offers nothing of value to me. 

Last week alone I served 4 servings of this copy-pasta:

Filming a session does not make the session complimentary. If anything, content creation adds additional work on my end. If you'd like to  <your insert fetish here> you're welcome to book and pay for a session. If you'd like our time together recorded for your private enjoyment, that can certainly be arranged for an additional fee. 

The respectful-but-moaning would-be subs who have nothing of value to offer also often suggest how great it would be to be in a lifestyle arrangement with me. They fantasize about the authenticity of it. It's an interesting POV, I can see how someone who's never experienced a lifestyle arrangement might think that sounds exciting. Imagine how hot it would be to be my 24/7, long-term, committed, live-in. Well, the other day I handed my live-in a bill to be paid, and he replied that those two sessions we had back in 2007 were the most expensive he's ever experienced. It took a beat for me to catch what he meant, and then I laughed out loud. Although I think he forgot a few sessions, by my recollection it was more like 5 or 6, his observation was on point. He hasn't seen me in a latex catsuit unless it was watching me walk out the door to work since around 2007. I know, it's a weird niche kink, but it works for us.  

Is that what you were imagining? 

You want to join the list of boys I am never ever going to _________, it'll only cost you, everything. 

Does my tribute still sound unreasonable? It is by far the least costly way to access time with me, but by all means if you wish to finance my winter home, I do so badly want to add the Snowbird experience to my charmed life. Or Maraschino could use a little German sister, I saw a pretty beamer in a blue I've never seen on a car before, why don't you find out the name for me. I'll check if there's room in my stable for you.