It's almost Ooey-Gooey Heart Day.
Are you single? Committed? Something else entirely too complicated to explain? Sames! Let's be BFFs forever and ever.
Ya know, we probably could look at Valentine's Day as the end of cuffing season. While it is apt to still be freezing here in the artic circle where I once again reside, my libido thinks spring is approaching. Well, if I'm being honest, my libido always thinks it is spring. But I digress, Valentine's Day, if we all agree, can be the end of imagining you need to be half of a couple to feel complete, and we could just focus on having so much fun instead.
I rarely imagine I have to be half of a couple to be complete. But I was half of a couple for most of my adult life, so sometimes I'm not entirely sure how to do a thing solo.
The very first Valentine I experienced without a live-in partner was when I was 45. I had relationships of various statuses, but all of them were long-distance. Imaging myself without adult company on Valentine's Day sounded awful, so I hosted a kink-friendly cuddle party.
When I say I don't know how to vanilla, you should believe me.
There was a playmate who asked, what if you sacrifice everything, spend years committed to this dynamic, then the little vanillas grow-up, everyone retires, and he doesn't want to be with you?
Well, I'd probably be bitter and angry, wicked bitter even, if that's how my life unfolded. But that's absolutely not going to happen. Oh, he might not want to be with me in a decade, he might not want to be with me tomorrow. It seems unlikely, but sure it is absolutely possible that could happen. What is absolutely not going to happen is the part where I sacrifice everything, or even really anything of value, to be in this dynamic.
We passed five years the other day. I was, if I am being honest, up in my feels that we weren't together on that day. We weren't even in the same country, cue Prince's International Lover and let's reframe all of it. We weren't together on the day he asked me if I wished to belong to him either. You've heard the story haven't you? On that day in 2018, I was the Dungeon Mistress at a Princess Gemini event. Our biggest event to that point, everyone on the team had brought their A-game and the event was amazing, a success by any standard. I was bouncing on a massage table to House of Pain's Jump Around, I don't even like House of Pain. But I was working over this pretty little kitten, and texting flirty things with Master John. I was radiating happiness. This year on the 27th, I was up in my feels a little, and a guest at an amazing party, flogging a pretty kitten with mile long legs, wishing my top was there to enjoy the moment with me.
I have made life altering changes with my top's encouragement and discipline. I sacrificed smoking, vaping too. Diet Pepsi is burning on an altar, along with unhealthy relationships, and poor financial choices. My top would not only not ask me, he would never allow me to sacrifice a thing that was in my best interest. I am tasked with taking exceptional care of his property, and I am so committed to doing that. I am absolutely certain a decade from now you will find me radiating happiness, I will trust the universe to sort out the details.
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