Up All Night with Mistress Cassidy

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

People Plan, Gods Laugh...

Just wing it. I had a magnet that said that ages ago. Slave allan reminded me of it when he quoted Of Mice and Men to me the other day on Fetlife.
The other day when I ordered myself to bed-rest hoping I might throw off the cold that began Wednesday night. The cold that altered my plans to return to Massachusetts Thursday. I will do my part to keep the Gods amused, I will continue to plan. But I will also accept that I am where I am meant to be, when I am meant to be there.

So we are in Richmond. The plan, go ahead laugh Zeus and Athena and Horus my most favorite, cackle away. The plan, currently, is to stay through the holidays. The plan is to continue to give all of my energy and focus to building in Richmond. I'm letting go of my anxiety about this. It did seem like the best idea was to go back to Massachusetts, see my regulars, replenish my shrinking savings and come back with a new cushion. Yet every time I am about to put my toothbrush in my purse and head out, the universe loudly says, in Samuel Jackson's voice,"Just sit your ass back down.".
So what are we doing in Virginia? What does giving all of my energy & focus here look like? I've expanded on a component of my sessions and added an entirely new thing. Aftercare is an area of sessions that always concerned me. In play between partners aftercare, in my opinion, never really ends. A scene, an experience can be revisited any time it needs to be. That is impractical and unreasonable in a professional setting. What I have always done is to leave a two hour empty space in my schedule after the end time of all appointments. Depending on the theme, at most it takes an hour for me to clean my dungeon. Sometimes it takes much less. Even for the themes I know will take less, I still leave a two hour block. Then if a session goes a little over, I can allow it. If the sub wants to switch gears when we actually meet, it isn't a big deal. If a client has an emotional response to their experience, we can take as much time as needed to work through it before I put them behind the wheel of their car and send them back to the real world. While I feel that is pretty generous of me, I do not tack on an extra fee for that time, I also feel like sometimes it isn't enough. It is rare for a sub to need that hour immediately after a session. Most clients leave shortly after our time together ends. I am confident that they are fine, ready to go back to their vanilla worlds. What I wonder about is what are they feeling as they are getting ready for bed that night. Or the next day when the marks have faded, or when bruises have set in. My ability to check in with them is pretty limited. I encourage everyone to get in touch if they need to, but it would be inappropriate for me to reach into their vanilla lives to check on them. We'll come back to this in a moment.
I have a friend in Massachusetts who is a professional "cuddler". She offers platonic, wholesome, clothes on affection. I was fascinated. She helps people feel acceptance, loved and yet she doesn't call them dirty, little- well never mind what I call my subs. What a concept. It's interesting but I could never offer that, I'm a smoker. The idea came up again recently. I'm not a smoker anymore, remember when you thought this was interesting? You could totally give this a try now. At first I intended to try to keep it distinct and separate from my BDSM work. My first cuddling client had been in my space for exactly 1 minute when he said, so I googled your phone number and I see you are also a professional dominatrix. This has been echoed by every cuddling client and inquiry since. So much for avoiding crossover.
How does this tie back to aftercare? I haven't had a bdsm client find my cuddling ad yet. If they are googling to check my reputation there is only 1 small cuddling ad in a sea of BDSM ads. I could avoid crossover in that direction for quite some time, I don't wish to though. Telling my clients about it in the course of their session gives me an opportunity to talk about aftercare. It gives me a logical place to reiterate that I recognize the importance of good aftercare, and in a sense it reinforces that they have my consent to reach out should they need more. They don't have to schedule a cuddle session, although they are welcome to if they wish. Just knowing that I offer them, reminds them that the warm moments we shared were just as sincere as the moments of discomfort I gave them. When I put your head in my lap, when I stroked your hair and told you that I was proud of you, that really happened too. Reminding them that their top is also a warm, compassionate person gives them permission to reach out should they need more follow-up.
There is just one more idea I wanted to share here, but I feel like this post has exceeded a reasonable length already.
What's a domme with an idea to do? Just a little tease...

I'm going to introduce a new idea on Chaturbate this week. What is it? Oh you'll have to tune in to find out. What day will I be unveiling it? I'm not sure. People plan, Gods laugh. I am signed on almost every night at about midnight. Pop in, around midnight & see if this is the night.

VIRTUAL SPACES:

Chaturbate: Mistress can be found on cam most nights after midnight until about 3AM EST

https://chaturbate.com/in/?tour=7Bgecampaign=hoETIroom=mistresscassidycream

email: cassidycream15@gmail.com

Fetlife: MistressCassidy

Groups on Fetlife:

• https://fetlife.com/groups/175329
• https://fetlife.com/groups/166037

Twitter: Cassidy Cream

Insta: Cassidy Cream

Snap: cassidycream

KIK: Mistresscassidycream

KIK Groups:

• Erotic Hypnosis with Mistress Cassidy Cream
• Financial Domination, Wishlists PayPigs
• RI Footlovers
• Pretty Feet of Massachusetts & RI

Airtightlifestyle.com: Mistress Cassidy

Blog:

https://mistresscassidycreamsmusings.blogspot.com/

I am a Dominatrix

A couple weeks ago, on Mother's Day specifically if you're curious, I found myself chanting, "I work in the adult industry not a daycare, why am I being forced to deal with so much juvenile bullshit.". I wish I could say that all things quieted down from there. I can't, they didn't. What I can say is that my top, as always, had some insightful words and encouragement. 
So doesn't that make you a submissive, or maybe a switch Mistress Cassidy? If you enjoy being flogged, if you look to another dominant for guidance, if you knelt with your head on the floor.., um, what? The temp just went up a little in the room and I lost my train of thought.
Where was I?
Mistress Cassidy, Cassidy Cream and even vanilla, you saw me slip my legal name just recently didn't you? I'm not going to again, but yes even that woman, are tops, alphas, type As, dommes, dominants etc. I am all of those women and I am a dominatrix.  Let me tell you how I know this.
I love to wear corsets. They make me feel sleek, they remind me to stand straight and to own the space I am inhabiting. I feel strong and impenetrable in a corset. A corset is fashion. Enjoying corsets does not make one a top. Right now I am sitting here in leggings, a beater and yesterday's make-up, and I am still a top.
I make magic when I swing a flogger. I can make it dance an eighth of inch from your skin, just enough to stir the air around you and swirl the little hairs on your arm. And I can bring it down like thunder, causing plasma leaking welts to burst forth from you. I can do this while coquettishly swiveling my hips, sometimes with my eyes closed, in time with Take Me to Church or anything the DJ might be spinning. When I am finished you will drop to your knees if I ask you to and you will recognize me for the Goddess I am. Swinging a flogger is a learned skill. I am not a Type A because I  can swing a flogger. Anyone with the tools and patience can learn to do the same. Today I am catching up the electronic part of my job. I am doing laundry and while there is music playing there isn't much hip swiveling happening. I am still a type A alpha.
I like to be indulged. I like for there to be flowers in every room of my home. I love breakfast in bed, and see nothing wrong with requesting it on a random Tuesday and then again on Wednesday. I might not even say thank you if I am distracted, but that is rare- I tend to have impeccable manners. Being indulged is a side product of having had indulgent partners in my life and of having grown-up an only child. Today I am single. I do all the things myself and if I want breakfast in bed I will need to make it myself, like a muggle. Or I will need to pay for a hotel & room service. Enjoying being indulged is not what makes me a domme. When I make my own breakfast, I am still a domme.
I like to make people uncomfortable. There is a whole spectrum here. I like innocent discomfort like when I am speaking to someone and I can see them struggle to maintain eye contact, hear their voice catch a little and know that I am making them think less than wholesome thoughts.And I like more intentional discomfort, I like causing pain.  I like looking directly in a subs eyes, and slowly applying more and more pressure to bits that aren't intended to withstand much pressure at all. I love the moment when without words I see a sub slip from oh please you can't hurt me, to oh please don't make me ask you to stop hurting me to a desperate can't you hear me begging you to stop hurting me. But I only engage in those activities with those that have asked me to. I think everyone I know (or at least almost everyone I know) , including the people who ask me to hurt them, will tell you that I am mostly a kind & gentle person.  I am still a dominant if I break out my hot stones and give you a massage.

At our girl party several weeks ago I tapped my very good friend Mistress Dahlia and asked if she work me over a bit. Things have been stressful, I've mentioned that haven't I? I had new tools I needed to experience, and I had a real need for some hard core stress relief. I suppose I look submissive. She's slapping me between the shoulders with my new rod, it stings quite a bit. For fucksake I am biting the side of my thumb, is there anything more submissive than this? Now for those not as in-tune with my body language, I am absolutely blissed out. I am relaxed. I feel safe. I feel Dahlia pouring her attention into me and I am happy to receive it. I am ever so thankful that Dahlia knows what she is doing and I do not have to coach her through what I want, but there is no submission happening in this photo. Am I sure? Well this photo is a moment later...

I found myself having to yell at some ass across the room for messing with the music. Interrupt my bliss, they're lucky they still have a head at the top of their neck. 

I am still not sure that I have conveyed what I intended to here. 

 The night of our girl party, I was going to have a couple cocktails. I knew I wouldn't be driving. I was with a dozen people I would trust with my life. There was no reason I couldn't let my hair down. Then my Hazey was a little bit sad, about a boy. Mistress skipped the cocktails, and did her best to remind Hazey how valuable she is to me and how much I love her. That is what a top does.

When I go places, I am in the driver's seat. 

When a thing goes bump in the night, I get out of bed. 

When I have feelings that are not conducive to safe play, I either work through those feelings or I do not play. 

If ever someone suggested that I played in a manner that was unsafe, I'd sit down with a pen and my notebook and ask them to tell me precisely what they were talking about. I wouldn't stand up again until I was certain I heard every word that was said to me, even if it was painful. I wouldn't move until I knew I could correct the action they brought to my attention. Until I was certain that they were mistaken or that I now knew how to do this imaginary thing safely, I would never again do this thing to another human.  

This is what I mean when I say that I am a top, a Type A, an alpha, a domme, a dominant, a dominatrix. 

I mean, I am responsible.

In all ways, always.

The truth of the matter is, that is what I love and I wouldn't have it any other way.  

What is Love, Baby Don't Hurt Me....

Oh that is a tacky title isn't it? While this sat on my dashboard waiting for a final edit, the placeholder title read :Insert Clever Title Here:. This had more edits than my average, about half were done while humming Tina Turner, What's Love Got to Do with It and the other, including this final was done while nodding my head to one side. If you're too young to catch the reference, perhaps you are too young to read my blog.  
I'm trying to write several entries for my blog and schedule them to post over the next week or so while I once again try to quit smoking. It's one of the things I find especially challenging to do nicotine free. With that in mind I tapped my friends and asked them to come up with themes to write about. My good friend and our psychic adviser, (yes, Princess Gemini Enterprises has staff spiritual/psychic adviser. ) suggested writing something about love within a BDSM dynamic. My first response was recognizing that it will probably be a really difficult subject for me to tackle at this time. Which is OK, Mistress sometimes enjoys when things are really difficult. Upon further consideration I decided that when your psychic adviser makes a suggestion you should probably listen to her.
I don't know that I am the best person to offer any insights on love. I love everyone. Sometimes I feel like people either don't take that statement seriously when I say it or that they judge the depth of my experiences of love and determine that I do not in fact know what love is if I can say with honesty that I love everyone. Whatever. What other people think of me is none of my business. I love you stranger reading my blog. I do not have to know you to know a woman allowed her body to be cut or split in half to birth you into existence. I do not need to know you to know that you possess an immortal soul, that just like mine is unique, perfect and flawed, vulnerable and resilient. I do not need to know you to know that while there is in fact no shortage of love in the universe, there have been moments when you craved love desperately and could not feel it, so let me give you a little of mine. I have plenty. I will not run out and I know no one has too much. What do I know about depth or love, I am a navel gazing, professional dominatrix, liberal snowflake.
Of course there are different manifestations of love. I would give you my last dollar. I would give you my last cigarette, yep even the one labeled, "Emergency-if quitting just sucks too much." Tell me that isn't love. I would not allow my body to be split in half for you internet stranger, but I have submitted to that for the souls that were entrusted to me. If love is arranged in a hierarchy, the love I feel for those souls sits miles higher than any other love I have experienced.  Let's be honest though, the profound love a parent feels for their child is largely one directional. Let's hope that those of us who are parents all strive to be parents worthy of our children's love, but it would be unhealthy if they felt for us how we feel for them. Further, that level of intensity is simply unsustainable if humans were wired to feel that for all other humans. While it is entirely a different experience of love, the love in a healthy BDSM dynamic in many ways, for me,  mimics those feelings. Perhaps the profound devotion is comparatively turned down, but then ideally it flows more or less equally in both directions. For me, whether it is within the confines of a single experience, a reoccurring arrangement or a committed ongoing relationship, feelings of love are always present. I screen my new submissives well, most of the time I do "click" with them, but I don't always. Sometimes, in person, the chemistry just isn't there. Regardless of how well we click, for the length of our time together I will feel protective, I will feel nurturing, I will strive to know you and to bring out your best self. It may not be the most intense manifestation of love, but it is still a feeling of love. Within an arrangement that is ongoing but perhaps informal, uncollared or otherwise a not committed dynamic, it is a similar feeling further enhanced by the familiarity one develops over time.
Which brings us to the last tiers of my love map. The love I feel for my committed, collared  submissives. I will give to my sub anything within my ability to give. I will continuously evaluate what I know to be best for them against what they want. I will challenge them to push themselves, to be their best self. I will do my best to guide them, to help them navigate their experiences and feelings. I will mentor them, and learn from them. I will as much as any one truly can, love them unconditionally.
And... I'm going to give you another peek into my personal life here. The love a dominatrix feels for the top she submits to. On another day I am going to write an entry about identities. I had yet another conversation about it this past weekend. I am going to write a voluminous entry on why I will correct you if you suggest that I am really a submissive, a switch or any term other than Dominatrix/Dominant/Top. For now I will explain it in the most simplest of terms. I am not a vegan, but I love carrots. I am not a submissive, I love my top. I have mentioned my vacation many times. I have mentioned how exhausted I was before I left. What I haven't mentioned, although it was probably implied, was how burnt out I was feeling. Months before when someone had asked me what I do, I had joked that I was a fantasy fulfillment dispenser. In the weeks and months that were to follow that joke started to feel true, and to not feel funny or silly or whatever feeling I had when I first uttered it. Perhaps the flow of love and energy between a top and bottom isn't quite more or less equal all of the time. Particularly with my submissive clients, but also to an extend in my personal relationships, sometimes I find myself saying subs are needy, demanding little creatures. I forget sometimes that we do not all have the same experience level. There are things I assume everyone knows, BDSM 101 if you will, but really there is no reason I should make such assumptions. Who serves whom in a BDSM dynamic? Who's in charge? When my feet are aching on a Sunday, after a weekend spent dancing in heels, when my phone rings and it is not a foot worshiping subbie but rather a subbie with a shoe fetish, what sort of session do you figure is going to unfold? Foot worship, shoe fetish, aren't they nearly the same thing? Can't I just demand this little bitch rub my feet like I need? No, not if one wishes to build a returning client base. As the top in my work and play, I am responsible for the scenes I engage in, I am in charge only in so far as I play within my own comfort zone and I do take absolute responsibility for my scenes. Sometimes the juxtaposition of the conflicting points of view is invigorating, sometimes it is just exhausting. Sometimes a top needs aftercare. Sometimes a top needs to say, here this is every thing I need, do you wish to be a fantasy fulfillment dispenser for me?  Our dynamic is still relatively new. It is a simple arrangement, that is completely free from vanilla entanglements. I feel known. I feel heard. I feel unconditional acceptance. I feel protected. That is the one that surprises me the most. It is a feeling I was unaware that I wished to experience in any significant manner. The practicalities of our situation dictates that feeling is largely only a feeling. I have a mandate to keep myself safe. I could swear I was doing a great job of keeping myself safe for the past 45 years and I didn't have any intention of not continuing to do so, but now that concept has taken on an entirely new dimension for me. I find myself contemplating it with nearly every decision of significance I make. For example, as I started to write this entry, and with each re-reading and subsequent hitting of the backspace button, I have asked, is this emotionally and professionally safe to share? Does it hurt or enhance my image? It wouldn't be terribly safe to tank my career. Particularly now when I am about to embark on some huge, I am so excited but still not quite ready to share, projects. Hold your breath you little mutes, and watch for the announcements. Are these feelings of mine reciprocated in a more or less equal flow? I have no idea. If I spent much time contemplating such questions I would have to consider if I too might be a needy little creature, and I do not have time for that much navel gazing. Quit smoking, make good choices, be safe; they echo sentiments I have heard before.

Are you doing something... sexual right now?

I'm not being provocative, it is quote from my favorite scene in one of my favorite movies.

Secretary Maggie Gyllenhaal 

The movie is Secretary, with (deep sigh) Maggie Gyllenhaal. Isn't she divine? Sorry, Mistress was distracted for a moment there. If you haven't seen the movie, you should- it's smart, sexy and yes at times the story line is a bit problematic but it is light years more entertaining than 32 hues of blue or whatever that  'bdsm' movie is called. Let me share the scene for those that haven't seen it. Maggie's character, Lee Halloway,  has just runaway from trying on her would-be mother-in-law's wedding dress for her upcoming nuptials with the definitely not-kinky, lamb-like Peter. She ran back to her boss/dom, played by James Spader, who is having something of an OCD/mental health crisis himself (it is his character that causes me to use the term problematic over and over again during the movie but that's a review for another day). Spader's character, E. Edward Grey, orders Lee to sit at this desk, with her elbows on the table until he returns. Then the ass goes off to work out, but that's not where I was going. Lee is sitting at this desk, for days,  and the fiance` she just bailed on comes in, rips her away from the desk and asks (accuses) her, "Are you doing something.... sexual right now?" She looks up and says, "Does this look sexual to you?".
Sometimes muggles don't get what I do. Sometimes would-be clients don't get what I do. The most common misconception is that professional domination is perhaps a code word for escort, which of course most people think of as a more polite term for prostitution.
Am I sex worker? Sometimes I help my subs ease their private parts into a metal cage, with or without internal spikes, and slap a padlock on it. Does that sound like something sexual to you?
Until recently I my favorite over-used statement was, I do not engage in anything as pedestrian as sucking and fucking with my submisives. I still don't, I am just trying harder not to judge other people's kinks- if vanilla sucking and fucking do something special for you, who am I to knock it.
Is BDSM just about sex with a kinky twist? I am engaged in several personal BDSM based relationships. I do not wish to be crude but for the sake of clarity I will say it plainly, only one includes sex. Yet they all include an intense level of intimacy. Intense, what do I mean when I say intense? I have what is largely a long distance, service oriented arrangement with a very dear friend of mine. He was actually the person who suggested this subject matter for an entry. I have known him for over a decade. Our friendship spanned a period of life changing personal experiences for each of us, a time when our families grew and a time when we each experienced painful losses. He is having surgery in a few weeks. It is my intention to take a week or maybe 2 off during the busiest season of my job. I am going to travel 600 miles to hold him. I will assist with caring for his family. I will feed him soup, home made.  And will spank, burn, flog or whatever activity he feels will best support & assist his healing whenever he wishes. I will tell him repeatedly that he is my good boy and that I am so proud of him. Does that sound like something sexual to you?
A BDSM session is of course an adult experience. It is often an exploration of fantasies that are sexual nature, but it is more than that. It is an exploration of one's identity, a time to expand or affirm one's boundaries, and  a safe space for exposing one's soul.

Mistress's Escape: Part 2

Can you see that glow? 

So Mistress spent 2 days in Richmond with her friends, and then jetted further south to spend time with someone special. Now Mistress isn't the kind of woman to kiss and tell, so you little voyeurs are going to be disappointed on that front. I mention it at all only because the traveling portion of my vacation greatly outpaced the visiting portions of my vacation. Over the course of 5 days, I had around 30 hours alone with my thoughts behind the wheel. I love time alone behind the wheel, I should pencil in these trips far more often. 

A couple things that I have held as hard limits as a professional dominatrix unexpectedly crossed my mind for reconsideration during my travel time. I am the first to acknowledge that as a professional I am a pretty conservative dominatrix. Safety, in all forms, is always a top priority for me. I don't just mean the safety of a specific act, I also mean the well-being and emotional safety of my submissives. I play in many settings, with people I have varying degrees of relationships with. The one on one professional scenes I engage in with clients are in many ways more intimate than any of the other settings. What a submissive client shares with me is often what they can not share with anyone else. I strive to create an atmosphere without judgement, and for this I am rewarded with candor and raw honesty from my clients. When their interests match my own, an amazing experience unfolds. I love this about my vocation. The flip side of this is when a scene ends, my clients return to their vanilla lives alone. I am available should my subs reach out for follow-up or aftercare; but I can not usually reach out to them. I can not compromise their vanilla life to inquire if they're experiencing sub drop, if their bruises are fading (or remaining) as they wished. And, I feel like most people don't consider this component of a professional dommes life, I can not reach out when I need aftercare. Tops drop too. I am a verbose, articulate person. After play with my partners or friends I can say I need feedback, I need cuddling, I need a sandwich and my needs are met. It's just not an option after sessions as a professional. I strayed off subject here a little bit from my intended subjects, but I'm not going to edit. 

Back on track now, what specifically crossed my mind for reconsideration was cold starts, and tapping out. For those who may be unfamiliar with those terms, a cold start is a scene that has been pre-negotiated and begins without further discussion when those engaging come together. Kidnapping scenes for example might be best played out with a cold start. Tapping out I imagine is a more recognizable term, using one's safe word, calling the scene, tapping out. Whatever one may call it, by tapping out I mean ending an activity because one has reached and perhaps breached their limit. 

I have never allowed cold starts in my professional sessions. I maintained that it simply was not a safe way to play with a stranger. At the start of a session I ask my subs about their health, I reiterate the interests they have shared with me previously and I establish my boundaries & expectations for our time together. It has worked quite well for nearly 20 years, but it is not without flaws. I decline scenes that I believe I would enjoy if they don't lend themselves to this ritual. Transitioning from welcoming, inquiring behavior into the actual scene can be challenging for me even after all these years and I have always recognized that most subs have a difficult time switching gears too. I am an experienced player. My negotiation skills are beyond reproach. Why am I denying myself experiences I know I will enjoy? Do I trust my screening process? Is my faith in my skill set false bravado? Am I doing what I have always done just because it's what I have always done? I pondered those questions for many miles. I am ready to expand my experiences, and I'm going to offer cold starts when appropriate. 

Tapping out. I instruct my submissives to use a traffic light colors for their safe words. Yellow if they need me to ease up, red if they need a full, immediate stop. I spend so much time on this pre-scene. To new subs I say, "As this is our first time playing together, for today only if you say stop, don't,or no I am going to pause. I am going to ask you for clarity, do you mean to say red or do you wish to continue? We will proceed from there accordingly." That's a lot of words. I have also always taken great pride in being able to say that the only subs who tap out in my scenes are those who have specifically asked to be pushed to their limits. I am now not only not proud of that statement, in truth I think I am a bit embarrassed by it. Subs are needy little creatures, they stumble in their nervousness and stutter when I demand they bare their soul to me. It is a rare day that I get a brave soul who can articulate that what they really want is to be taken beyond their limits, to be pushed to breaking down. Yet I do know, truly know, no one seeks out an experienced dominant because they wish to play with a kitten. Hard limits are hard limits, boundaries are for expanding. I am not a kitten.  I know the limits of my gear. My tools are very much an extension of myself in my hands. Have you seen me swing? Why do I give my subs safe words if I do not trust them to use them? I play with adults. I play with competent people who have worked up the nerve to seek out what they need. I am confident in my ability to comfort my subs and tend to their broken selves. Mistress has expanded her boundaries. I wish to be able to say that the majority of my submissives tap out when we play. 

Mistress's Escape: Part 1

Let's call this Before. This was the last party before my vacation. I sincerely had a great night, and loved every moment of it. This was taken at about 3am. I had been in the ER with a family member 7 hours before. I had left another party 24 hours before. I had oh, maybe 3 hours of sleep in those 24 hours. 

Despite a couple of significant hiccups, Mistress's much needed vacation was amazing, refreshing and everything I had hoped it would be. I made it home safely, and was back in the dungeon swinging Dreamer and Dancer with renewed vigor within 8 hours of returning. 

My trip was very much a planned sabbatical. If you read this blog regularly, or follow me on the various other platforms I maintain my professional presence, you are aware that I maintain a very hectic, demanding schedule. Most weeks I am in my dungeon on Tuesdays and Thursdays for private sessions. Every Friday night, and 2 Wednesdays a month I am the lead dungeon Mistress for Princess Gemini Enterprises. Saturdays I typically spend at Safe Haven or Twizted Acres, as a guest to enjoy downtime with my partners, friends and playmates. However the tight-knit nature of the scene community dictates that there are many points where crossover between play mode Mistress Cassidy and work mode Mistress Cassidy occurs. Saturdays are when that crossover most often occurs. There are several monthly munches I try to attend. Of course behind the scenes I have many additional responsibilities. I have, or rather had, two collared long distance submissives. I often have short term contracts with additional long distance submissives. There are photo shoots, planning meetings, and recruiting vendors. We are about to expand our schedule to include a monthly aftercare gathering, and we are in negotiations with several local and out of state venues. We are in the pre-production stages of offering a monthly podcast, video content, and live cam viewing of events. Oh I forgot the most time consuming part of my profession, networking and promoting. Can't have the best parties in New England if we don't find the best players in the community and invite them to be our guests. Can't be a resource for exploring and growth, if newbies don't know where to find us. Can't sink my floggers into tender flesh, if willing flesh doesn't know how to contact me. And all of this is in addition to my vanilla responsibilities. I have many vanilla responsibilities. I am a volunteer leader for a large organization that would be inappropriate to name here, but I give them several hours of my time weekly year round. My pony is a great source of stress release for me weekly, that requires hours of care & maintenance daily. 

Let's call this During. I am about to meet one of my best friends for sushi.

When viewed through one lens, the timing of my vacation was poorly planned. I have too much on my plate to jet to Richmond to have sushi with my bestie. When viewed through the other lens, the timing of my vacation was long overdue and could not be put off another moment. Jetting to Richmond for sushi with my friend was the only thing that mattered that day.

This will have to be a two or more part post, I have officially run out of time and quiet for blog updates.

Travel Q&A with Mistress Cassidy & slave allan

1: Now that the two month of 2018 is behind us and we look ahead to spring is upon us. Does the rebirth of spring have Mistress Cassidy planning any changes to yourself or to your dungeon and what interesting events are upcoming for you and the dungeon crew?

There is so much going on with both my dungeon at Safe Haven and with Princess Gemini Enterprises. Most of these things are still in the planning, not ready for disclosing just yet stage. But stay posted. Mistress is also moving very soon, and I may need some subbies to haul my gear where ever I'm going next. Yes, Mistress needs to move in about 6 weeks, and as of yet, I have no idea where I am going. 

2: You mentioned either to me or on your FetLife profile that you would like to pack your toy bag and travel more this year to offer your domination to other willing subs. I realize that traveling to my neck of the woods is

not in the plans but is there some destinations that you may be considering.

Canada actually is on the agenda for July, but I am looking at Toronto to visit a friend of mine.

Let's see what's on the calendar so far... I'm heading to Richmond next Sunday, March 4th. I'll be there for 2 or 3 days, and sessions will be available while I am there.

Then Mistress is heading to Myrtle Beach, SC for more of a workcation

And then the whirlwind trip will wrap up with Mistress spending a few days having some glorious downtime with a playmate in xxxxxxxx. No sessions will be happening during that leg of the trip.

Austin is tentatively on the calendar for June. There are a couple more trips also penciled on the calendar, but those like the plans for the dungeon & parties are still in that not ready to announce stage.

3: You mentioned on FetLife that you need some help and you have a need for an assistant. For those fans who choose not to be on FetLife, would Mistress like to mention here for them what assistance you are looking
for.

I'm not sure which post you're referring to, I have been looking for several professionals. I was looking for a stylist, but I have found Miss Hazy and so far, she's working out quite well.

I also need a web designer to do some work on my site. 

I could use a media manager, especially when I try again to quit smoking. It's impossible for me to manage my accounts during the first few days quitting, it has been my downfall twice now.

Moments from Our Events

How busy has Mistress been? So busy that my poor blog is this neglected. I would tell you that I am rededicating myself to keeping it fresh and updated, but we all know I would be lying, right? I love keeping a journal, I love being able to revisit the highlights worth noting in ink, but I love living a life that's journal worthy far more. Sometimes that means there's just no time to jot it down. My biographer can sort through my Facebook posts and bills later to sort out what I was doing when someday. For now, this blog will continue to be a spot you may catch an update when I get to it.  

So what has kept Mistress so busy? All the things good and wonderful :) Have I mentioned that I am the lead dungeon Mistress for Princess Gemini Enterprises? If I hadn't, I have now. I virtually met Princess Gemini oh early in the fall I think. In October I responded to a message that she was looking to bring a greater BDSM atmosphere to her swinger parties. I attended her next party with my gear in tow, and the whirlwind began. 

Princess Gemini is just the sweetest, most down to earth, wildest woman you may ever have the good fortune to meet. She really embodies what it means to be a strong, sex-positive, body-positive, progressive, intelligent, and self-determined woman. Instantly I knew this was the woman I wanted to work along side. And I was beyond thrilled that she welcomed me to join her team. In just the few months that we have been working together her parties have grown quickly that we have outgrown one of our primary venues. 

I hope that some of my local lurkers decide to check out our parties soon. If you're too nervous to schedule a one on one session with me, this is the best way to get to meet me & get past your nerves. And to help you Mistress has decided to share a few of her favorite pictures from recent parties... 

Mistress Cassidy with Mister Pain's pet Miss_Sunshyne at the Glow Party.
I couldn't ask for a sweeter, more thoughtful metamour in my life.  

Mr Pain who does not care for the term switch & really isn't, submitting to a demo flogging with lovely but out of the frame Mistress Nightshade. 

Mistress Cassidy flogging our Princess at our Mardi Gras party

I don't know why, but I take the best selfies in the restroom. Mistress getting ready for a night of fun at Twizted Acres. 

The Glow after party, Mistress had an amazing night, with body after body submitting to her floggings. I think when most of us think of aftercare we think about what our subs need. Of course a Top's responsibility doesn't end until their sub has been properly cared for after a scene, but Tops need aftercare too. This is what it looks like for me. My adorable cuddly stylist Hazy and Gemini letting me melt into them so I can release all the energy I absorb from my scenes and recharge so that I can do it again!